One day you are minding your own business and buying a few plants at the nursery and the next your house is looking like a forest scene from Jumanji. Are you secretly speaking to your plants wondering…how did it get to this?!
You might be a crazy plant person!
It’s important to know the signs and take action early before you turn to the green side!
Stage 1 – Enthusiastic and dangerous
You decided you need a plant for your apartment so you buy the cutest one you can find in the nursery (maybe a Maiden Hair fern) and plonk it on your dining room table…it dies 2 months later. You figure that’s just how long plants last!
Someone tells you to get a succulent because those are impossible to kill… you kill it faster than a cockroach in the kitchen!
Lesson learnt: You can’t just put plants anywhere in the house, they need to get the right light and water.
Stage 2 – Life will find a way
Most people don’t get to this stage!
After recommendations from the nursery staff you buy a few more house appropriate plants. Your Snake Plant or Peace Lily has survived a few months under your care, your confidence is up. You only water when the top of the soil is dry. You figure you are getting the hang of this plant thing. You check your thumbs… like there is a green glow.
You are in the honeymoon phase, you got to the plant party early and are not sure it’s going to be cool. Like a vegan who has started CrossFit, you are starting to tell all your friends about plants. You start to do a bit of research on plants, mainly how not to kill them.
Stage 3 – Collection addiction
You expand your plant collection faster than a teenager collecting baseball cards. Your plants are starting to overflow on your cabinet. You think it’s time for a dedicated plant shelf, you convince yourself on the benefits of indoor plants and the whole air purification thing, if one plant is good for you 30 must be amazing! You buy a dedicated plant shelf and look forward to taking your first ‘Shelfie’.
Your Instagram and facebook accounts are now fully subscribed to all the best plant sites. You are getting plant ideas everywhere. You consider starting macramé just so you can make a cute plant holder.
photo from insta @whynotknow
Stage 4 – Midas touch
Mother nature has blessed you with amazing skills of life, everything you touch starts to bloom.
You consider that you might have too many plants in the house (your partner mentioned something), but that thought quickly passes. You are now into plant styling, trying to work out how that trailing String-of-pearls can accent the living space or maybe you need a bushy fern to soften the hard edges of the wardrobe. You see a cool unique plant on Instagram…you have to have it!! Not only is it unique…its variegated. You scour the local nurseries, look at eBay for plant auctions. You laugh at the ridiculous prices people are bidding for plants… and consider putting in a bid.
Stage 5 – Crazy sets in
You have more plants than your crazy neighbour has cats. You have learnt the names of each of the varieties…and a few of their scientific Latin name. When people walk into your house they have to push aside your rare variegated Monstera.
While watching TV you comment more on the plants in the movie than the actual plot line. You consider importing unique plant varieties from around the world and wonder how strict the import laws really are. Your duvet cover, scatter cushions and T-shirts now all have plant designs. You consider going on holiday and realise nobody will be able to take care of your plants as well as you…. like a character from Avatar you are becoming one with the forest creatures!
There you have it, act now before its too late. If you have any other crazy suggestions, leave a comment at the bottom of the page 🙂
Good books to read to take care of plants:
- How not to kill your house plants – Veronica Peerless
- Practical House plant book – Fran Bailey & Zia Allaway
People to follow:
- Meeschmid_plantlady (Instagram)
- Planterina (Instagram)
- Summer Rayne oaks (Youtube)
